When No One Is Watching...

The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out.

Thomas B. Macaulay (1800-1859) English politician, essayist and poet.

Thomas B. Macaulay (1800-1859) English politician, essayist and poet.

Maharani...Indian Princess

Maharani means Indian Princess.  It's the name of the new Living in Light Collection and I am super delighted with all that stands for.  In this collection I wanted to capture my beautiful nation India...the colours...the traditions...the vibrancy...whilst staying true to Living in Light's edgy signature style.

I envisioned colours that would make some one want to explode with joy coupled with cuts that were not only original but super comfortable.  I wanted to create a collection of vibrant statement pieces that made the wearer feel amazing and super confident.   Each piece would be like a royal robe...worn with sweet abandon...complete liberty and childlike delight...  

The wearer would be like an "Indian Princess" so free in her Father's Palace...at complete rest in who she is...in where she is....in who's she is...as she freely danced in Royal Gardens...surrounded by beautiful colours and treasures of the Kingdom...inhaling the sweet aroma of life and enjoying the lush surroundings of all that has been lavished upon her...irrevocably secure in the Kings Love.

What Happens When It Doesn't Happen?

Recently I came back from India, totally stoked, crazy mad buzzing...filled with amazing testimonies of how God smashed it...saving untold souls...healing so many people...supernaturally touching life upon life, so very spectacularly.  And you know someone on the outside looking in, reading the Facebook posts or perusing the India Series, hearing of the amazing testimonies that God orchestrated may be a little bit tempted to presume that the miracles just kept on coming...that encounter upon encounter kept bringing forth signs and wonders...everyone got healed...everyone got saved and even delivered woop woop...aaah yes never was there a dull moment in this forever rosy adventurous pursuit of the Kingdom.  Smiles...errrr nah.  Because there were definitely moments where I didn't see God move...encounters where nothing happened...momentum that fizzled out like a Deflated balloon.  Well maybe not that dire...because as far as I'm concerned pursuing the Kingdom is never dull...never in vain...and certainly faaaaar from dire.  But yes there were moments when nothing happened.

I had one such moment in a large store in the Town Centre near my mum's Orphanage.  A local place where I am no stranger to the staff, although everyone there stares at me funny whenever I visit and no matter how friendly I endeavour to be or how Indian I hope to appear they still look at me rather oddly.  Anyways so I'm there with lots of clothes and bits that I have picked up to buy.  My hands are kind of full.  I approach a member of staff to ask him something about something and he responds with silent actions, pointing to his ears and mouth signalling to me that he is deaf and dumb.  Taken aback, I walk away from him slowly nodding in feigned understanding and awkwardly thanking him anyway.

As I take slow steps away from him I can no longer concentrate on anything my mum is saying to me...her voice somehow fades into the background as now exploding inside my soul is the exchange that has just taken place, magnified to an unbearable level where all I can hear in my ears is that this man cannot hear and he cannot speak.  I stop walking and turn around.  Placing my shopping in my mums hands I ask him if I can pray for him.  He doesn't understand what I'm saying.  Using actions, I ask for his permission to pray for him.  He nods, shrugs his shoulders and a little bit cynically lets me lay hands on his ears.  I start to pray.  I am filled with faith, convinced he will hear.  I desperately want his ears to open and for him to be able to speak so badly.  I imagine how amazing life for him would be, if right now the ability to hear and speak entered into his life.  Everything would change for him.  I blow into his ear the breathe of the Holy Spirit.  A crowd gathers.  All the staff members that usually look me up and down as I shimmy across the shop floor in my Western attire, my heavy make up, and weird cockney accent, are now surrounding us full circle, watching this drama unfold clearly wondering what the frick this blightly bird thinks she's doing with their colleague.

And as I pray amidst this crowd of sceptical onlookers, surrounded by their unconvinced faces, their polyester mix uniforms and unenthusiastic smiles, I choose to ignore them and fix my heart on the eternal truth, that Jesus died to set this man free from every ailment and disease. Yet I'm praying and believing and praying and believing and nothing is happening.  I'm binding and loosing, I'm declaring and decreeing...I'm gently releasing the victory of the cross and although I am totally expectant, nothing seems to change.  I speak into his ear and ask him if he can hear my words.  He shakes his head to indicate he still can't hear.  I continue to pray for a while.  I stop and ask some of the onlookers to write him a note asking him if he feels anything.  They oblige and carry out my request.  He reads the note.  Nope, again he shakes his head.  Nevertheless I pray some more. Customers are now also gathering.  I'm still praying. Still nothing.  I keep praying.  Clearly a little bit stalkerish by now, I'm sure.  Yet I can't seem to walk away.  I don't care that I look like an idiot. I don't care that nothing's happening in the natural.  I don't care that I'm in a local store where I will never be able to shop with dignity again.  Haha.  Because I just want him to be healed.  Yet he doesn't appear to be.  Not even one bit.  Despite what Jesus had done for him on the cross he remains unhealed. He doesn't seem surprised though.  If truth be told it's like he never expected to get healed.  I guess this must be totally weird for him right.  And so I give in.  I accept that I can't want it for him, more than he does.  I accept that the encounter is over.

I tell him Jesus loves him, somehow wanting him to know he is special.  I think I'm almost apologetic...as if somehow, Jesus loving him is the boobie prize.  Of course I know that it is the complete opposite. On the contrary it's everything.  Jesus' love transcends any manifestation of healing.  But I can't explain any of this stuff to him, because he can't hear me...he can't hear me with his natural ears...Nor I guess with his spiritual ears.  So I simply signal with my hands as best as I can, that Jesus hearts him.  And then I stand there a little awkwardly, not quite sure what to say to try and make things better.  Looking at the crowd and then back at him I'm obviously gutted that the miracle hasn't happened, yet I'm reminded that I don’t have to try and “make things better".  I am sober in my understanding that when push comes to shove it's actually got nothing to do with me.  You see the way I see it is that the manifestation of the miracle is not part of my remit...my job is to pray by faith and release the victory of Jesus’ finished work…now somewhere along the line if there’s a glitch in the matrix I know it’s not been on God’s part because on His end – it’s a done deal…but somehow, somewhere the manifestation of healing or breakthrough or salvation has got lost in translation I guess.

And so I don’t have an explanation of why someone doesn’t get healed and another does. Or why someone gets set free and another stays in chains.  Maybe it was unbelief?  Maybe it was deeply rooted strongholds.  Maybe it was me?  Who knows? I don't think a twelve step programme, bog standard formula or troubleshooting checklist can ever explain to us, this side of heaven, why some miracles happen and some don't. But this I do know – that the finished work of the cross provides us with complete wholeness…nothing lacking, nothing short…and I know wholeheartedly that God wants to heal…wants to deliver…wants to save…wants to love…no doubt about it…so when we pray for others we can afford to be totally confident in His ability to heal and set free and reconcile…to overcome and to break through…we don’t have to sweat the small stuff and work out how and when and why…we just have to be the “sent ones” willing to step out in His name, in His authority and enforce the victory of the cross whatever the result may be…and whatever the outcome may be, we are just ambassador’s functioning as representatives…not in our own capabilities, or authority but in his authority, in His love and in what He has already done on the cross…and I don’t know about you but for me that makes stepping out by faith ever so liberating…to know that as long as I am representing the “One” and releasing His victory in His name, then if no one gets healed, or delivered or set free then it’s nothing to do with me…and if thousands of people get healed, get saved, get set free…well hey…praise GAWD...then it’s still nothing to do with me!!

x x x

The Triple Filter Test...

Me and my big mouth, haha! Time and time again I get super convicted as I find myself saying the wrong thing…maybe saying far more than I needed to say…or perhaps saying it totally in the wrong manner...or even saying it for the wrong reasons…pretty much saying things that should have remained unsaid. Again and again I am soberly reminded...often a little too late...that my words have the power of life and death in them. It’s totally a lifelong journey isn’t it, guarding our tongue? Thankfully I can say that with the help of the Holy Spirit, through God’s gorgeous Word so full of treasure, haay ho…I’m definitely getting better...PTL!  I find that when I have been fasting I am far more sensitive to the words that I speak, often times thinking about what I am saying before I say it and being crazy mad intentional with my words. But what happens when I'm not fasting?; It's a little harder to manage that's for sure but it's not impossible, because we have the Holy Spirit right? Amazing principles that help us be the best we can be.  I love how God's amazing laws are found everywhere in society.   

In fact something I came across the other day which is surely yet unknowingly rooted in the Word, regarding gossip, from Socrates the great philosopher definitely resonated with my spirit:

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, "Do you know what I just heard about your friend?" "Hold on a minute", Socrates replied. "Before telling me anything I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."
 
"Triple filter?"
 
"That's right", Socrates continued. "Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be a good idea to take a moment and filter what you're going to say. That's why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?" "No", the man said, "Actually I just heard about it and ..."

"All right", said Socrates. "So you don't really know if it's true or not. Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?" "No, on the contrary."
"So", Socrates continued, "you want to tell me something bad about him, but you're not certain it's true. You may still pass the test though, because there's one filter left: the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really." "Well", concluded Socrates, "if what you want to tell me is neither true nor good nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?"

How true right? I wish I could have the Triple Filter Test programmed into my mind so it kicked in by default every time I said something!! Such a sobering reminder…maaan may all that we say be true, good and useful. May it be loving and may build up others.  May it be wholly beneficial and truly wholesome. And hey...if it’s none of the above may it be kept totally to ourselves!

Ephesians 4:29 (AMP)

Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk [ever] come out of your mouth, but only such [speech] as is good and beneficial to the spiritual progress of others, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it may be a blessing and give grace (God’s favour) to those who hear it.

Matthew 12:36-37 (AMP)

But I tell you, on the day of judgment men will have to give account for every idle (inoperative, nonworking) word they speak.  For by your words you will be justified and acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned and sentenced.

 x x x

Selling Art...or Selling Out...

As soon as I heard the words poetry, the Indian artist had my attention. Amongst the "you look my stuff" jewellery beach traders, the "you want dolphin boat ride ma'am" tour guides and the rip off ayurvedic masseuses prowling the beaches of Goa, the offer of  buying a genuine piece of someone's art certainly seemed like a refreshing respite. I looked over and smiled as he walked towards me, advertising his poems. "Anyone like to hear some poetry?" He asked.

Yeah defo I thought to myself. He continued calling out as he approached my sun bed. I’m sitting up getting ready to give him my full attention, when suddenly I hear him say "I got every kind of poetry...I got love poetry...sex poetry...f*** poetry." He then added a whole other selection of vulgar poems he had just before stopping by my feet. Eeek!! I felt like someone had thrown up on me. Shocked, I asked him why he was saying that, like seriously dude…you have got to refrain from using that kind of filthy language! He responded that people want to hear it. “Errr, not everyone”, I informed him! He clearly thought I was mad...and off he went on his merry way, loudly continuing to advertise his vulgar poetry on the beach front.

The next day I see him again, as I'm walking past and there he is...calling out to people to buy his obscene poetry, using the same foul vocabulary as yesterday to arouse interest. Once again my ears were graced with his filthy sales pitch. I stopped and approached him. I asked him why he felt the need to use such obscene language to sell his art. I kindly informed him, that it was wrong of him to approach people with the assumption that this type of foul language was okay with them.

He said “sorry maam, but I think you're the only person on this beach who's uncomfortable with it...people on the beach like this kind of talk”. I said I doubted that - given how many young families were on the beach. And then I added that even if the whole beach was accustomed to that type of profanity it didn't mean he needed to stoop that low just to suit what he thought people wanted to hear - surely he had more self respect than that. He shrugged his shoulders. I walked away shaking my head like an old granny.

The following day I'm chilling at a different beach further along and there he is again, walking towards me. Suddenly my heart goes out to him as I contemplate just how far he has to walk each day to share his art and earn a living. This time however, I hear him advertising his art without a single profanity clearly in consideration towards little old moi, and so as he approaches my bed he says “poetry...poetry... respectable poetry..." I smile at him, encouraged by the change, and he comes over, sits down on my sunbed and suddenly he apologises about yesterday.

He tells me he wasn't able to receive what I was saying...because he was irritated about other stuff that had happened and so wasn't willing to listen to something that could potentially teach him something valuable. Wow, how humble. He explained that although he sort of understood where I was coming from he still didn’t see anything wrong in what he was doing. People liked to hear words like that he said. He explained that he believed he totally had self respect...but that he liked to shock people and gain their attention. He liked making people smile...and if people liked that kind of language then what was wrong with making people happy by using such vulgarities. He shared that when he made people laugh, it made him feel liked and accepted.

I told him that I understood, but just because everyone seemingly liked profanity it didn't make it okay. He could still choose to be wholesome if he wanted to - instead of lowering his moral standards in order to gain the approval of mere strangers - who within a fleeting second of hearing his "shockingly" obscene sales pitch were most likely to completely forget about him. Therefore was the shock tactic really worth it?  I made the statement that surely his poetry was good enough by itself, without it needing to be reduced to a bunch of shocking profanities in order to be accepted. He quietly nodded and then said "no one will be interested in hearing my stuff if I don't sell it this way. The vulgarities are what attract people's attention."

My heart grieved at the deception that held him hostage. Desperately wanting to make him understand it wasn’t his profanity that had aroused my interest – it was his art form, I said “geezer...you had me at poetry!"  I added, that there are other people like me who want to hear and read and experience wholesome art. I advised him not to throw his pearls at swines and tried to convince him that he didn't need to lower the tone of his art for the sake of likeability or to generate sales. Be true to your art - surely if people are only buying your poetry because they want to read the F word and not because they dig your gift then hey they ain't worth selling to. I implored him not to sell out.

Finally I gave him an example of when I was doing Stand Up Comedy - I had a choice. I could use the usual sexually oriented, self demeaning, cursing, x-rated, material in my act or I could work much harder in order to stay true to myself and use only clean, wholesome material on stage. I chose the latter and as challenging as it may have been I didn't sell out to suit the masses. I suggested he did the same. 

We actually had a great convo. I shared how vulgar I too had been before having my mind renewed as a Christian. He was intrigued and asked me loads of questions about my faith and said what I'd shared definitely made sense. Before leaving he promised he'd read some of Jesus' words to get some wisdom. Over the next few days whenever I would see him on the beach he would call me "poetry lady" and after a brief chat he would walk much further away before tentatively unleashing his shocking sales pitch. 

Imagine my joy though, when a few days later he comes to me and tells me he has totally reassessed his “sales pitch” after being told the same thing by several other people on the beach. He tells me he now says...”I write all kinds of poetry…funny poetry…love poetry…naughty poetry”. I smile, totally pleased with the turnaround...grateful for his renewed mind.  He thanks me for helping him understand a better way. 

Haha!  So, it's with a real sense of appreciation that I ask him to share some of his poetry with me on the final day of my holiday. He happily shares all his clean stuff with me and when I select his Mandela Poem to buy asking him how much to pay him he tells me he couldn’t ask me for payment given that I had already given him something so valuable. Wow. How crazy, mad encouraging. Yet I do pay him, for I wanted to bless him…and I wanted to honour him for keeping it clean. I was totally blessed too, for I believe our conversations were a turning in the tide for this young artist…and for me personally I loved seeing his outlook transform into a positive, wholesome view that would certainly bear good fruit in his life.

As I pondered my encounters with him, I was all too aware that we all have similar sorts of decisions to make time and time again...whether as artists or as people in general.  Each day we too are faced with various choices where we will need to decide if we will be people pleasers or God pleasers...if we will choose to stand set apart, steadfast upon our convictions or if we will succumb to dancing to the drumbeat of the masses, simply to fit in...simply to be accepted...simply to be popular.

You know I think of this poet on the beach…who was so willing to lower his standards in order to be acknowledged…in fact he had become so desensitised to that which is vulgar that he hadn’t even realised how foul it was…he had just assumed that because it was what everybody wanted it was okay…and so he was ready to provide it. He was ready to be obscene because it made him attractive…it drew people to him...it caused people to laugh with him...and for a moment...though short lived...He felt he was accepted. His art was accepted. His talent was accepted. Likewise I think as creatives we can mould ourselves or our art to suit the masses…we provide what we think people want to see...or hear…or read.  We think if we give people exactly what they want then they will accept us or accept our creativity...or they will affirm us...yet the truth is that whatever we use to attract someone is the very thing we will need to keep using in order to sustain their interest. Not just with our art but with everything in life…

Therefore I reckon it's always better to keep it real...that way, those that hang around you do so because they know and love the real you...or those that invest in your creativity do so because it’s a genuine reflection of who you are, not a mirage that's been created just to fit in…and those that become a fan of your work do so out of genuine affection and approval of what you carry not because you misled them or because you have compromised.

It’s a question we must all be willing to ask ourselves…as artists - what are we willing to compromise for the sake of acceptance? Similarly, as Christians what are we willing to compromise in order to stay cool, to avoid persecution or to be accepted by this world…a world which is ultimately fading away? See, because the truth is, that we don’t need to compromise at all.  Because we have been accepted just as we are - in fact we have been accepted warts and all, in our very worst condition.  We don’t have to change our personality, our art, our gift or our faith to fit in or to get anyone to accept us because we are already fully, irrevocably accepted, as we are. And what we all carry is unique and beautiful and does not need to adapt to make people like us.  We are anointed to be successful in our God given destinies, whether people support us or not. 

Yet as we continue to grow in our faith and at the same time discover our callings and the God given impact that we can have upon our families, our society, and upon our generation, we will find ourselves time and time again faced with the challenge of doing things the way the world does or doing things Kingdom style.  And as hard and as at times lonely as it may be to stand for all that is noble, pure, true, holy, praiseworthy and lovely…without compromise…without shame, with conviction - it is so worth it, because the more we stand up for what’s right…what’s truly right, the more we will empower change.  And though we may at times be in the minority, lives will surely be impacted - one at a time...if only we determine that, one single voice, as hushed and overlooked as it may often seem in the intense clamour of this world…can indeed make a difference. x

To Truly Be Known...

Innate hunger for intimacy rages within

It can’t be satisfied through mere skin to skin

Two can never become one, simply flesh upon flesh

True intimacy comes, when deep calls to deep

I spent many years giving my body away.  Upon reflection, I wonder how I was able to do it so readily...so frivolously…so nonchalantly.  I suppose, I figured it was the norm… that’s what they did in the films and music videos right? All the cool chicks were doing it…it was a rite of passage… a firm must for a good time girl like me.  I suppose it made me feel desired…I was also young and reckless…I was looking for love…and most often than not, I was high as a kite. Yet the encounters would never last. Even my long term relationships, would inevitably become meaningless. So on I would move to the next dude, continuing my insatiable pursuit to know someone intimately and to be fully known in return.

As I journeyed through this insatiable quest for real intimacy, I fleeted between two conflicting mind-sets regarding sex – one, that it was the most intimate and fulfilling way in which one could know another person – so deep… so connected…so meaningful…that surely nothing else could satisfy.  And then, in complete contrast I thought you could quite easily have a fling with someone and it mean absolutely nothing…that you could easily walk away from an encounter with a guy and never ever give the exchange a second thought.  

On both accounts, I was deeply deceived.  For I have now come to understand that, firstly sex isn’t the deepest way to know another.  For, to truly be one with another it must fully encompass your spirit, soul and body...not just your physical man.  It must be a connection far deeper than mere flesh…it must envelope your entire being…the deepest core of you and it must be a mutual exchange embedded in love…so honouring…so precious…so permanent…so very pure; one that simply cannot be found outside the confines of marriage.  Therefore secondly - sex simply cannot be something casual, temporary or meaningless, because with or without consent sex is a mutual exchange of body, soul and spirit, and therefore can never be taken lightly.  To engage in it outside of God’s perfect arrangement is a complete violation of yourself, of another  person and of God’s beautiful gift of sex to mankind.  Yet to have sex God’s way…maaan, its beautiful beyond belief, pleasurable beyond words and intimate to the very core.  You see, because true intimacy according to God, is not skin upon skin…flesh upon flesh…it’s deep calling deep.

And that’s what God desires for His kids.  Authentic, pure, intimacy within the confines of marriage.  Enjoyable, liberating, committed sex without fear, shame, confusion and loneliness .  The Bible clearly tells us that “there’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.” Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever—the kind of sex that can never “become one” (1 Corinthians 6:15-17 MSG).  No wonder so many find themselves joining with many, yet connected to none…laying with several, yet lonelier than ever.   Because only in a loving, pure marriage is that type of loneliness truly eradicated and real lifelong, spirit deep intimacy cultivated. 

But you know God doesn’t want to just limit us to intimacy within marriage.  He wants us to first and foremost experience this with Him.  He wants us to truly “KNOW” Him like Adam knew Eve (“And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain” Genesis 1).  The foundation of the term “Knowing” is deeply relational.  So when it comes to knowing each other within marriage it obviously means to have sex…but all “knowing” stems from this and although it may not always refer to sex, it still refers to deep heart involving, relational intimacy.  This term is further used in the Bible when referring to the act of prayer…communicating with God...through prayer, intimately becoming one with God, and birthing the things of God.  Now that might freak you out…which is fine.  But it is what it is…He absolutely wants us to live in that place of tender deep calling deep unhindered communion with Him…as the beautiful irresistible Lover of our soul. 

Jesus invites us to “know” Him…for all of our days…for us to know eternity through deep relational closeness to Him. (And this is life eternal, that they might know the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent. John 17:3).  This type of intimacy is the deepest, most fulfilling, all-encompassing sense of belonging…of being known…being loved and accepted, that we can ever experience.  It touches the very core of us…it meets our deepest need in our inmost being and every other union pales in comparison to it.  But for me what total smashes it…what totally blows my mind…what will forever leave me amazed...is that this crazy, indescribable, incomparable sense of being completely and total at one with another, is with someone I cannot see…cannot touch…cannot lay with…yet I know with every fibre of my being that I have been consumed by Him and have become one with Him.  And each time I experience the tangible sense of oneness with Him I am floored…complete ravished…overtaken.  It’s simply takes my breath away.

That’s what moves me the most.  That, I spent years abusing my body in my pursuit of intimacy…I used my sexuality time and time again…gave every part of me so easily and carelessly I guess, ultimately in order to feel close to someone on the inside.  Only to find that it was when I finally determined to preserve my purity, treasure my body, guard my heart…and set my self apart...that I experienced the deepest, most intimate, closest form of intimacy I have ever known.  And ironically, there was absolutely NOTHING physical about it…everything about this core level intimacy is deeply relational, affirming and whole.  And how very crazy…that it ends up being, not with a guy…but with the Author of love…with God Himself.  Wow. 

This song "The Knowing" is written and sung by my beautiful friend Lucy Grimble with the lovely Larna Martin dancing.

Countless Reason's To Be Excited in 2014...

Happy New Year beautiful ones, soooo excited about the new year...can't even contain it!

Image from http://wallpaperwa.com

Amazing God thing happened today! Gotta share! Filled me with even more expectation and excitement about the future!

Basically, my mum is facing some hardcore financial battles at the moment with the Orphanage. She was even considering taking a loan. I was so grieved yesterday by this. I felt God tell me to ...wake her up last night and pray over the phone with her for breakthrough. The tangible presence of God while we prayed across the oceans was so heavy, that I actually felt myself being physically pushed down by the weight of God's nearness. We knew something had shifted when we finished praying. Now, all we needed to do was wait for the miracle.

I went to call her again this afternoon...the whole time I'm expecting God to show up on her behalf today somehow, some way...even if it's just some of the amount. As I pick up my phone to call her I see an email from Just Giving telling me someone had anonymously donated over £700 (including gift aid) to the Immanuel Orphanage Just Giving Page this afternoon. My mouth dropped. I smiled in wonder...this page hasn't had any activity for six months. In fact, it was meant to expire today. Wow.

I love how He shows up in the most unexpected ways!! !! How good is HE? How loving? How caring? How very faithful? Maaan! This is the God we serve. Let's be soooo encouraged as we enter this new year...we have the most INCREDIBLE GOD on our side...loving us...leading us...taking care of us...taking us on the most delightful love adventure ever...! We have everything to look forward to as we embark on a new year...absolutely everything! xxx

Whoever made that donation...wow...thank you thank you thank you for your obedience...may you be blessed beyond your wildest dreams!!  x

This New Year...It's okay to make mistakes! x

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're Doing Something.

So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody's ever made before. Don't freeze, don't stop, don't worry that it isn't good enough, or it isn't perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you're scared of doing, Do it.”
― Neil Gaiman

I like this quote.  Not because I'm all about encouraging failure.  But because I want 2014 to be a year that we take risks...and soooo often we don't want to step out because we don't want to fail...but hey if that's what's standing in the way then don't let fear of failure stop you from going after your dreams...fail a hundred times if that's what it takes...make mistake upon mistake if that's what will finally cause you to succeed...just don't stop trying.  Let 2014 be a year where you keep trying no matter what the result.  But hey...we're champions...the winning is in the trying...and you'll find that because we are champions - if we are willing to try, the victory will certainly follow! Happy New Year. x

As You Wish...

A fave film of mine is called 'The Princess Bride’. It’s a beautiful, wholesome fairy tale, packed with romance, high adventure, pirates, princess, giants, fencing, miracles…and a deliciously crazy mad dose of clever humour. 

"As you wish", is the strapline of the film, often quoted by Westley - who is one of the two main characters.  He says this, whenever his master and childhood sweetheart – Princess Buttercup - makes demands upon him, her farm boy…to clean this, demolish this…and clear that. She is totally oblivious to his undying love for her. Eventually she also develops a deep love for him, but then there’s a wee glitch in the matrix where Westley suddenly dies and they are separated forever.  She is inconsolable.  But unbeknown to her, Westley actually survives…and becomes a pirate. 

However, as time goes by, they are reconciled once again, both finding themselves simultaneously fleeing the evil Prince Humperdinck.  Buttercup is unaware that this masked Pirate, whom she despises so much, is in fact her beloved Westley.  And so, when finding themselves in all sorts of life threatening situations, the princess ignorantly proceeds to tell this whatless pirate exactly how to go about saving them.  Unable to reveal his true identity, the wise, strong, invincible Pirate humbly suggests otherwise, but in typical Buttercup style, her royal highness weeps, tosses, sulks and insolently paces around - until she gets her own way, often to her own detriment.  And Westley, knowing far better, yet unwilling to violate Buttercups free will, shrugs his shoulders, and gives her exactly what she asks for.

Image from http://fanpop.com

In Buttercup’s defence, she isn’t trying to be bossy, or demanding…or sulky…she isn’t trying to large it and stubbornly pull her weight around…she just doesn’t know how to trust anyone,  given that she’s had her heart shattered so deeply…and the pain…the disappointment…the loss…has rendered her broken…she just can’t take any more sorrow…and so she lets her emotions totally rule her…and although Westley her true love is right there all along…who can totally see the bigger picture and is in complete control…and even though, all that is needed is for her to just trust him and his wisdom, love and strength…she can’t because she’s tunnel-visioned…and so in her limited wisdom, her impatience and in her woundedness she demands that she gets her own way…because she just "CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" (Sound familiar??) And so Westley just relents…knowing the consequences will be painful and harmful for all involved…but taking the “tough love” approach and letting Buttercup learn the hard way…he simply says “as you wish”.

I’m sure God at times, is forced to do that, with us too.  I’m sure there have been occasions when we so badger Father God that He just relents and says “okay sugar…in my permissible will, I’m gonna give you what you want”!!  And so we get our own way.  Wow that’s a scary thing…to know that we have the liberty to force God to give us what we WANT, rather than what we NEED! To my relief, I truly have to say that, in His beautiful Love and Wisdom He has not given me what I want. Even at my most desperate…at my most demanding…at my most stubborn…if what I have been asking for has not been in line with His will, I sincerely thank God that, He has not let me have my own way.  He has not succumbed to my pleading…my begging…my weeping…and my pathetic arguing…He has not given in to my emotional outbursts however sincere or heartfelt they may have been to me.  Instead, He has comforted me, quietened my soul and strengthened me with His presence yet He has thankfully, shielded me from my own desires.  And time and time again in hindsight, I have been able to see why He has done that...why upon reflection “my way” just wasn’t the best way.

I think back to all the times that I have appeased God…certain that I will crumble and die if things don’t change…adamant that what I am asking for, is exactly what God would want for me for that season too…confident that what I desire for myself must surely be the right thing for me and for those around me…convinced that I am ready and mature enough to handle the very thing that I desire…only to find God saying No, or not yet…or not in this way…or not with this person…

And at that time, although I don’t understand why my desires are not being met…and even though I am desperate to see change, and even though I am filled with wonder and even confusion regarding what I must be doing so wrong to not have what others attain so easily…even then, I am aware that I just do not see the bigger picture.  I just do not have the divine insight that He has.  And as much as I may plead, beg, pace up and down, lament and even manipulate God… with every seemingly rejected prayer, shattered dream, delayed trial, overdue blessing…His ways will ALWAYS be higher than mine…and so deep down, despite the ups and downs, despite my innermost secret and unfulfilled petitions I am able to trust Him implicitly - knowing that He is far too faithful and far too loving to let me have my own way.  And I am so deeply grateful...because no matter what my desires may be...ultimately I only want Him to give me what’s best for me, and not, what I wish for.

xx

Championed

Sometimes we can find it really hard to champion our own abilities...our gifts...our talents. So, often times we just don't push ourselves...we don't strive for the next level...and we don't invest in ourselves...simply because somewhere along the line perhaps we're just not that confident in what we carry...maybe we don't even know if we've even got anything to be getting happy about...and if we think we have got something special then we just wanna stay humble and not be bragging about it...other times we're just too fearful of failing, or scarier still...succeeding?

Or if you're anything like me...maybe you're pretty much content bopping along doing your thing, not needing to even put yourself out there...just keeping it simple...blessed with your portion…growing in your creativity and expanding your borders bit my bit from the inside out!  Haha...BUT that was me up until recently…cause you see SUDDENLY to my complete and utter amazement...BAMMMMM! I got CHAMPIONED!

CHAMPIONED: To vigorously support or defend the cause of.

Informal - stick up for, throw one's weight behind, plug.

Synonyms: Advocate, promote, plead for, hold a torch for, defend, protect, uphold, support, back, espouse, ally oneself with, stand behind, stand up for, take someone's part, campaign for, lobby for, fight for, battle for, crusade for, take up the cudgels for; propose, sponsor, vouch for, second;

See the way I understand it, being CHAMPIONED goes far beyond even the general level of amazing support and encouragement we may receive from friends and loved ones, who genuinely interested in what we are doing, will lovingly and enthusiastically support us, promote us and encourage us to step out in our God given destinies. But you see to be CHAMPIONED speaks of something far stronger…it speaks of having someone definitely come alongside you, invest in you, vigorously support you, ally one's self with you and not only perceive greatness within you but choose to invest in the greatness that they believe you carry.

"Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and thinkers, but most of all, surround yourself with those who see the greatness within you, even when you don't see it yourself."

― Edmund Lee

Amazingly, when you are lavished with this type of unprecedented sponsorship…where you are divinely aligned with people who so passionately believe in you, are so invested in you, that they are willing to pour their time, skill, finances, counsel and prayers into your destiny, you find you actually have no choice but to see in yourself what other's can see in you. You are propelled to go higher…and give your own destiny all you have. No longer permitted to keep your light hidden, safely tucked away, gathering dust…and contentedly risking nothing, suddenly, you are compelled to face your fears and actually believe you carry something that could make a difference.

You know, I'm not entirely sure, but I think there is a risk that some folk just won't fulfil their destiny unless they are championed by another.  You see, somewhere along the line, I think our vision can often get blurry when it comes to our own gifts and abilities.  We can get so determined to maintain a humble and pure heart, not wanting to promote ourselves for the fear of having selfish ambition or going ahead of God, that we sometimes lose sight of what God has divinely put in us and what He does want us to boldly pursue, being confident that He is right there championing us.  Not only was the greatest demonstration of God championing us on the cross but He absolutely still continues to champion our lives today.  Often through others. 

And so it's a beautiful thing.  When someone passionately, vigorously invests in us - I think it releases us to actually see ourselves and our God given potential through heaven's eyes...it's almost as if we suddenly put on our SONglasses and BAM our vision clears.  We suddenly see that it's absolutely okay to love God with all your heart, soul and strength and at the same time to pursue your dreams, because ultimately they are from God anyway.  When God is our greatest desire, our dreams can never take His place and so we don't have to fear them...and the more we hang out with Him the more we learn how to navigate through the pursuit of our God given dreams and not only that, we enjoy reaching them with others.

To champion or to be championed is no light thing.  There is immense joy and reward for all involved.  It's a heavenly strategy for success I believe.  For you reap what you sow.  Those who champion other's, get championed.  So let's champion one another as a lifestyle.  Let's fearlessly, passionately empower one another and release heaven's culture of victory into our generation. x

This blog post is dedicated to the designer of the new Living in Light website, my beautiful friend Bianca who has simply taken my breath away with her championing heart. 

(Although I have been so stoked by so many incredibly special people who have invested in my life in so many amazing ways.  Thank you thank you thank you to each and every one of you!!)